All I wanted was to sing the saddest songs
If somebody sings along I will be happy now
Yours Truly
i am a female species.
quirky. grotesque. wayward. peculiar.
i am someone you'll never quite get to know,
but always long to understand.
you'll know i am soft, when you see me dancing.
you'll know i am hard, when you see me drinking,
from noon to noon.
i gave myself to sin.
and I've been there and back again.
all I need is somewhere I feel the grass beneath my feet
a walk on sand, a fire I can warm my hands
my joy will be complete.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
White Lies DID AN AMAZING COVER on Kanye West's LOVE LOCKDOWN at BBC Radio 1 Live Lounge. AWESOMENESS!
daaammn ! Kanye, you know i like you to bits but i gotta say that white lies PWNED you ! hahaha. Harry prolly sucked at the beginning of the song but he nailed the chorus real good. i love the guitar and the bass playin on this video.. oh and Jack is such a cutieeee pieeee !!
I'm happy because two of my fave bands are being featured on MTV Push. I'm gonna be seeing a lot of White Lies and Metro Station on TV, yaaay !!
10:11 AM
Monday, March 23, 2009
Often when we're feeling down, we focus on the bad and let the good things go unnoticed. We start to think we're incredibly unlucky and far less successful than the people around us. We compare ourselves to people who are prettier, wealthier, etc etc and end up with the very negative view of ourselves.
Meehh.
True, comparing ourselves to other people is totally useless, because everyone is different :)
4:08 AM
Friday, March 20, 2009
oh my sun, my always ready gun my symmetry, my place, oh refugee oh my star, my supernatural scar my inside out, my feeling lost without my fantasies, my silverchain a light like water, runs like the rain i turn my eyes to see, im on the other side and feel, feel alive..
10:10 AM
Thursday, March 19, 2009
im sick of following my dreams. im just goin to ask them where they're goin, and hook up with them later.
12:10 AM
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
I won a samsung DVD player tonight at Indika FM event. YAY ! well, nabil and boim won cooler prizes tho.. Nokia cellphone, Panasonic Camera Recorder.. motherfuckers.. BUT no need to feel envious about it.. winning a samsung DVD player is still better than nothing ;)
work tomorrow and i still dont know if i should hand in my resignation paper tomorrow or next week. ughh.. dilemma.
Anyways, im soooo happy ! Kite approved me on myspace ! YAY ! i just hope he'll regularly update his photos.. or post more videos of him.. i am soo addicted to him right now tee hee !
here is a video of him when he was on Juste Debout 2009 Popping Final in France. Kite teamed up with Fishboy (another Former Action boy) battled Gucchon & Kei from Co-thkoo.
8:16 AM
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
i know i have not been blogging for ages. I had no intention whatsoever to neglect it, it's just recently i have been really occupied with issues outside the cyber world. And those issues limited me from getting some time to sit in front of the computer and write about my thoughts, personal issues or just some random stuff.
As some of you might have known. I recently got a new job at my relative's company. I am working as a sales and marketing for one of the LPG Cylinder Manufacturers in Indonesia which has been appointed as one of the cylinder suppliers to PERTAMINA (State Oil Company). My job requires me to go back and forth to PERTAMINA in order to make sure the handling of our documents (invoice, official reports etc) goes smoothly and fast. I must say i dont mind doing it but i would rather not having any business or relation or whatever with Indonesian bureaucracy people. One thing i have learned about this country, that if you deal with them, money is always involved. For example, everytime i hand in our invoice i will also have to slip some amount of money so they will work on our invoice faster. Other than that i also have to put up some valves to sale by calling some of our competitors company (who are also manufacturing the LPG Cylinder). I must say i am very very bad at doing sales and also marketing. That's just not what i am. Everybody knows that the things i am really good at is doing something that's related to media, production, publicizing and creative idea. So when i am being faced with this sales-marketing field. I am having a real difficult time to adjust.
2 days after i started my first day in the office, i told my close friends that i was going to quit it. They advised me to stay a bit longer because they think this is the only option i have for this moment. They do understand that this job does not fit me well and this job is really not me. However, they told me to see it as a challenge and as a test to see how far my limit can go. Aside from that, they also advised me to keep my options open and helped me out by asking information if there's a job vacancies in the entertainment industry.
A week after, i decided to try my hard to put my best efforts and enjoy my job and still keeping my options open. I still annoyed my close friends by whining and complaining which lead them to skeptical thoughts on my definition of "try my hard and my best". And now after a month of working, and being in a calm state of mind.. i can see clearly that maybe i have not tried my best, that the refusal in my heart and mind has blocked me to enjoy my work and my willingness to give a good performance to the company. Yes, this is such a shameful thing.
A few nights ago, my aunt talked to me. She told me that she has been thinkin that i am leading such a wild life (she's talking about me freelancing) and she asked whether the thoughts of leading such a calm and quiet life ever crossed my mind. She was going to find me another job, but i refused right away. I think i have learned my lessons now. I took a job from her once and i felt miserable cos family involvement in work atmosphere is rather uncomfortable and awkward. I repeated the same mistake by taking my mum's advice to take the offer from the boss of my current company (who's still a close relative to our family.) I shall be more responsible of my own life and i shall be more open in dealing with consequences of my choices.
I have been thinking that maybe.. maybe i should just shut up and go back to the production world. I have been getting 4 calls for a CF makings and i turned them all down. It's killin me to think of how much money i have thrown out of the window by saying no to them hahaha. Despite the lack of sleep, despite the non-existent of social life, CF industries may not be that bad. But of course i have to make list of considerations before i quit my current job.
Another sad news, my dad's sister passed away last night (March 2nd 2009, 10:00 pm). I sent out my mom to my dad's hometown for the funeral, but i told my bosses and co-workers i left the town with her :P i know i know.. it's a shame of me but i just dont feel going to work after staying up 24 hrs straight !
Man this is going to be a long ass post but apart from the depressing notes, i also have to throw some bright notes in this post.
I am currently addicted to KITE, a japanese popper, who is also the winner of "Juste Debout 2009" in the popping category.
I swear he is not only CUTE but he also has MAD SKILLS ! his poppin' style is BATSHITCRAZY!
he is currently one of the "FORMER ACTION" crew and he is residing in Tokyo, Japan. He is 25 years old and it's fuckin hard to find more info of him on the internet, so please see it as a call for you to help me out finding more info on this guy haha.. I added him on myspace and im crossing my fingers he will approve me soon!